i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
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