his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
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