So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
not ubering you a puppy
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
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