Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
