I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I feel great
I just peed on a car
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
