you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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