you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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