When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
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