we have officially lost it.
Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
