they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
