my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
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