so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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