Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Randomize
