I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
