??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
It's just like the Real World with babies
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
