Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
He shit in the fireplace
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
