we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
