If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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