Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
