I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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