How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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