Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
