i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Houston, we have a blender
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
