btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Randomize
