Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
