I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
