after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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