If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Randomize
