yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Randomize