ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
