He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
