Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
