i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
