I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
i need some magic done to my vagina
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
