well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
