We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
