he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.�
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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