When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
