You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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