it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
