we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
