She said her name was "party"
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Randomize
