a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
