my mouth tastes like poor choices
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
