sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
When are your genitals available?
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Randomize
