Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
