with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
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