Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
