miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Randomize
