She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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